Spring 2016: The Power of Now Aha Moment #19 Failure is Okay and Failure is Not Final

Over the past two days I have been reading about failure in my personal development time. In the book the slight edge the author says

If you go through life with the philosophy that “failure is not an option,” then you’ll never have any good opportunities to learn.

In the Power of Now Eckhart Tolle says

You must have failed deeply on some level of experienced some deep loss or pain to be drawn to the spiritual dimension. Or perhaps your very success became empty and meaningless and so turned out to be a failure. Failure is connected to every success.

Our society teaches the opposite. Failure is bad. We teach kids not to fail in school or else they won't get anywhere when anyone will tell you the best way to learn is to fail and then use it as a learning and growth opportunity.

Failure is okay.

When I think about some of my big fails, it ALWAYS led to an awakening to get my life back on track or I graduated to the next level where if I hadn't failed I would have stayed in the trap of mediocrity not realizing there's something greater.

Failure is okay

It's okay to fail and be wrong. It's not okay to fail, be wrong, and stay down in the miry pit. Failure should be looked at as an opportunity to grow. If you're living an aware and connected life, then your failures will spark some deep conversations within yourself  at the spiritual level. How did you get to this point? What led you to the failure? What are you learning from this?

Where many people go wrong is that they fail, stay in it, and don't learn anything because they are in denial about failing  or blaming everyone else for what happened.

I often wonder if the big thing with failing is that we are worried about how we look to others. People who put on facades are hit especially hard by failure because not only does their facade come crashing down but then they must be forced to come face to face with the truth.  All of those ugly bits about themselves that they tried to hide with the facade have come to the surface.  Their Failure is on full display.

Failure is okay.

Failure should lead you to a deeper place within. It should motivate you to answer the harder questions about life.

When I had my epic fail in 2008 it led me on a path to discovering a relationship with God, understanding that he has  his purposes for my life, and pursuing my calling. When I failed in my management job after 6 months in 2013, it led me to work at a place I always wanted to work but never thought I was good enough for, and form my own business.

The failure of the management job opened me up to so many newer possibilities in life and they just weren't work related. My mindset actually shifted and I got a whole new perspective about myself because I was just beginning to understand the truth: I am enough.

I would not have understood this had I not failed at a management job that would have produced mediocre success at best.  I would have gotten trapped because I was comfortable.  The failure produced me to get out of the comfort zone and on the road to success.

Failure is okay

It's important to understand that just because someone has failed that does not mean they aren't worthy of love or affirmation. In fact that's when they need it the most!

Single People...

As a single person it's important to keep this in mind. People fail at relationships all the time. Just because a man or woman failed at their previous marriage or relationship doesn't mean that we should write them off. If they have learned and grown from the experience and they are willing to take another shot at love, then we should embrace that rather than look at it with skepticism and cynicism. Some of the greatest love stories happened to people who failed big time on their first time around.  There is failure in every success.

Note: I did say they should have learned and grown from the failure not blaming their spouse for all that went wrong!  

Failure is okay.

Failure isn’t Final: Failing in life and having a failed life are two different things.

Failure isn't final unless you decide it is. One of the reasons I used to be so scared of failing is that I thought that meant my life would be a failure. Failing in life and having a failed life are two different things.

People with failed lives have just given up. They are in the miry pit to stay. They blame everyone else for their circumstances and are anti personal growth. These people have resigned themselves to a lifestyle of misery. That's different from failing, having a spiritual realization and awakening, and growing.

Failing in life does not equal your life being a failure.  If you are still alive then you can still restore and redeem your life.

Failure is okay. Failure is not final.