Spring 2016 The Power of Now: Aha Moment #15: Enlightened Relationships - Acceptance Not Tolerance

“For love to flourish, the light of your presence needs to be strong enough so that you no longer get taken over by the pain body and mistake them for who you are.” - Eckhart Tolle

You can't think LOVE to death  and LOVE can't be about your ego. The best way I can to describe it is to simply let it be. Feel every moment without thinking it all to death or trying to figure out how you can manipulate the situation. My man Lenny K had a song called Let Love Rule and I believe that's a good description. Let Love be the head without your mind, ego, and pain taking over. You've got to let love rule

100% Acceptance

Eckhart Tolle says that the greatest catalyst for change in a relationship is: 

“complete acceptance of your partner as he or she is without needing to judge or change them in any way. All mind games and addictive clinging are over.”

That is why I continue to ask myself: What if God sends me someone and he’s not what I thought he was going to be on the surface?  What if he’s everything I need from an emotional and spiritual standpoint but on the surface it looks messy and very complicated.

Will you accept him as he is and let him be who he is or are you going to be one of those women who believe secretly that they can change someone or that he will change after marriage.  We ALL know how that ends.

“There will be no good guys and bad guys or victims if there is acceptance” - Eckhart Tolle

So many people like to be victims in their relationships. I know women who complain that their partners are unloving, discouraging, and don't support them. The men in their lives showed this disinterest from jump. They were never ALL IN and the women would say I accept that he's not romantic. You don't accept something and then continue to complain or try to change the person. What you've done is tolerate this type of behavior

Acceptance is different from tolerance because tolerance is giving someone permission to treat you a certain way. You allow the person to treat you that way without hindrance...even if you don't like it or approve of it. Acceptance is approving.

I've said that what I need most is affirmation. I need acceptance because I am so different. I don't need anyone else to make me feel like an outcast. I need affirmation. I need acceptance. The one who can accept me 100% is the one that I want to marry. The other side of that is true. I will need to accept my partner 100%. When I say acceptance I mean acceptance of him as human being: epic fails and big mistakes included.

Love the Human Being and Not the Circumstances

Many people partner with the circumstances and not the human being. They partner with and accept the money, the status,  the looks,The title, whatever. They don't partner with the human being and so when the circumstances change so does the “love”. It was never love of a human being to begin with. It was love of the ego and identity.

Maybe that’s why God will give us people that have hot mess circumstances so that we learn to love the human being and not the circumstances.