P31 OBS 5 Habits of a Woman Who Won't Quit: Not knowing where commitment leads

Staying Faithful and staying committed even when you don't know where your commitment will lead was another conviction from this study that I want to dig deeper into.

Not knowing the end of the story, where these commitments are going, but believing that God's purpose will prevail is exactly where I find myself at this present moment on This Sacred Journey

I am doing all of these "things" and staying committed even though I have no proof that it's doing anything, going anywhere, or serving any purpose.  I just know that I have CERTAIN BELIEF that this is what I'm supposed to be doing and if I quit, then it's not gonna happen....whatever IT is.  

The way the world teaches us is that we have a goal and we work toward it seeing the goal all the while.  Now you know I love goals and I love to write the vision on the tablet and yada, yada, yada. I've NEVER lost sight of my vision and mission but it is frustrating when you're doing and not seeing immediate payoff.

My business coach has me reading The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy and Hardy's philosophy is that you may have to work a long time, being faithful in the little things and continuing to be faithful before you see a payoff.  In our InstaWorld we want to see instantaneous growth and results.  Long lasting and sustainable results happen when you stay committed and faithful by nurturing and tending your life.

When we think of a harvest, farmers don't know if they're going to get a good crop or not but that doesn't stop them from tending to their crops.  What if on the second day after they planted, the farmer said: "Well I'm not doing this anymore!  Nothing is happening! I quit!"  Well of course nothing will grow if you give up.

In my two most FRUSTRATING areas, I feel like I'm committed and have no CLUE where this is leading.Yes I believe it's leading to my vision but I have no proof that it is.  

Sis Leora Overall at shiloh Church assured me God has already done it which is why I see the vision so clearly but I have no concrete proof that anything is happening.  I just believe that it is.

Writing

I have so much written right now.  I've got the makings for my Health/Fitness Lifestyle Transformation book  and I have done Lots of research in the past year.  I just keep adding on to it as I learn more and share my own story.  I'm glad I didn't quit on it.

I'm also chronicling my personal story during this season into a book/movement which I believe will help SO MANY women.  The funny part about THAT is I write it as we go along so I don't know what's going to happen.  It's kind of cool when to write it  that way cause I'm writing it as it happens to make sure I'm not telling a revisionist history.  I want women to see what happens when you have an outrageous dream, stay committed even though when you don't know what in the world is happening, and then let it come.  I want to let them know it's a process and you cannot give up or settle.  Plus I want women to know that you don't know WHAT can happen!

I'm committed to my writing even though I don't know where it will lead.  I have CERTAIN BELIEF that it will help women but I don't have any guarantees.  I just know that I'm not allowed to quit.

Prayers for who???

This one is truly strange.

Since 2013 I've prayed for my husband...not A HUSBAND but MY husband. Yeah it's crazy cause I am still single and have ZERO prospects.  Crazy right?  There have been a couple of times where even I've questioned why keep doing this when nothing is happening.  However I 'm starting to believe that God is doing SOMETHING even though I can't see it.

Let me share something that doesn't make much sense to me now, but that I believe will make a whole lot of sense to all of us once the dots start being connected.  Even I'm not sure why I'm sharing this but I feel led to and I've learned when ya got the stirring...GO GET IT.

September 2015

I had been praying for the man that God had laid on my heart for about 2 years...I got No Names and No faces. I don't know who I am praying for. However last September the prayers became more urgent. The stirrings became more vivid and intense.  I prayed for angels to surround whomever this was and to protect him from evil. I sensed wherever he was, that he was in a pit of darkness.  

I felt like there was a shift in my life.  I was ALL IN.  I thought it had to do with something else so I was just FIRED UP during that time.

The Holy Spirit said:

This is the beginning of your ministry. This is the first chapter in this new season.You've been doing the preparation in this last season of your life. You have taken this step of faith. and now  we begin: This rescue mission is not to turn someone from bad to good but to make someone who is dead come alive.  

Now this is crazy because it didn't seem like anything had changed on the surface but I felt a shift in my life. When there were no grand presentations I just chalked it up to being wrong and led astray by my feelings yet again.

Resurrection, Restoration, and Redemption

In 2014, I was told that the greatest thing I would do is to make someone else great. God had a process of Resurrection, Restoration, and Redemption that he was gonna do and I was going to assist with all this. However, NOTHING was happening....except that I was praying for someone who I have no clue on who he is.

After doing this study, I've started thinking "Well maybe that was what my assignment in this season. I was assigned to pray for someone and I needed to stay committed to that even if I didn't know where it was leading. I know this all makes me sound crazy but I'm willing to risk it. I'm ALL IN on the crazy and the legacy!!

Here's the actual prayer from when I was moved on all this:

I come on behalf of you my yet to be known husband whom you are bringing me to at the holy and appointed time.

Money, fame, and accomplishment cannot erase the hurt, the abandonment, the guilt, the shame, and insecurities. It cannot make up for the emptiness In the pit of your soul. Break every chain in Jesus name.  It cannot fight these tormenting spirits which are destroying you from the inside/out.

The only thing that will work is God. Only God can resurrect and make you come alive again. You're in the pit of despair and a dead man walking. This will end soon. Resurrection is coming.  Resurrection, Restoration, redemption

God I pray against the empty self which has taken over now and is keeping this man in torment and in darkness. The voids are being filled with cheap floozies (yep I prayed about cheap floozies), random sex, drugs, accomplishment,. Break those chains in Jesus name. The void can and must only be filled by you God and your purpose for his life. This stuff will never suffice for real meaning. We play for real meaning and purpose.

We pray against narcissism. It's time to stop having people around just to serve your own selfish desires and needs. I'm praying against selfish ambition and pray that you understand your purpose is to serve others and you will be blessed by it.  I pray that the Lord shows you that no longer have to live in torment worrying that you just have to focus on self preservation or else you will be left for dead.  That will not happen once you understand who God has called you to be.  God I pray for a breakthrough and SOON! (Sept 18, 2015)

What was this about?  I don't know.  I've started thinking recently though but what if when I meet Mister Mister we see that those prayers that I was praying made a difference.

I mean these were some really like passionate BREAK THE CHAINS IN JESUS' NAME...Loose all tormenting spirits from his life, Pray the Devil Back to Hell in jesus' name, and my favorite:  Lose the cheap floozies!

In that same season, David Kiteley preached the word that "Great Faith is not just for us but for someone else".  if I say I want my husband to BELIEVE and HAVE FAITH, then maybe this is the story that convinces him that Miracles Happen, they still happen.  How could I POSSIBLY have known all what was going on????  All I was doing was staying committed to praying and listening to what God lay on my heart.

I didn't know where this was all going to lead but I had (and I STILL DO) have CERTAIN BELIEF that this is all leading to the glory of God.  I cannot forget his Promise!

Didn't I tell you that you would see God's Glory if you believe?

To God be the Glory