Leaving Sundays: Ebony Exodus - The Jezebel Spirit and faux purity culture

I've heard the Jezebel spirit being preached about in church but when I heard it preached they were talking about men and women.

HOWEVER I am sick to death of the faux purity rules for women. These women are being sold a bill of goods.

You can read my rant about that on this blog.

The truth is women are being told to remain pure and then a good God fearing man is going to want them. These are lies and it doesn't work. Ask yourself why the few guys in church either go out and get some hot woman who has been saved for 10 minutes or has been doing her and now wants to be married.

I think church markets to the sad and desperate women so that they keep coming and giving money To the church or single ministries  in hopes that they will meet their Boaz. Sadly it often does not work out this way. The virginal church women are staying faithful and ending up alone on the pew.

A woman named Heather who left religion for several reasons says it plainly:

“More or less, I ain't got a god. cause he sure ain't there when I call on him. When I was giving tithes and offerings, the promises I was supposed to get I didn't get. With all that stuff I wasn't getting, I said, “Why am I wasting my time?” I feel like I wasted so many years submitting to some god when I could have been doing whatever the hell I wanted to do.”

What's wrong with being confident
Women in church are basically being told not to be too sexy and too confident because the men won't marry them because they are too tempting but then that's who the men go out and marry and the church girls are puzzled.

Then you have the issue of men being able to do whatever they want in church while women are supposed to be pure and chaste.

That's a big part of the problem: Men can do whatever they want while the women have to repress their sexuality and be less confident lest they be called a Jezebel...yet those are the types of women the church men go out and marry a lot of the time.

There are just Too many inconsistencies

Church guys are too soft

Here's something I noticed the guys that all the girls liked when I was growing up in church no longer attend or they are the pew warmers. They're not really into church.

Many of them were very confident and what we would call alpha males.

I can remember spirited discussions as teens and young adults about why girls in church preferred the bad boys or thugs. They didn't seem to be interested in the nice guys.

Well those nice church guys tended to be “soft” and beta males. They weren't the confident leaders like many of the bad boys. I guess the church guys got sold a bill of goods too.

I don't think Alpha males will last too long in church. They're not going to sit and listen to a man that they don't respect tell them how to live their lives. Many of the men in church are passive and alpha males aren't going to listen to a passive man.

The author makes a great point about rap music. It's very in your face about sexuality.
“While many religious leaders decry rap music and blame it for the promiscuous and sinful behaviors of young black men and women, no one considers that it might be an outgrowth of social oppression and unrest caused in significant part, by the Black church itself which has historically had a chokehold on black sexuality and has attempted to eradicate any form of sexuality deemed sinful"

As a Lil Kim and Trina fan, I can say it was awesome to have Black women be so outspoken and confident in their sexuality. I suppose It was much better than the sexually repressed and unattractive women at church.

Why Abstinence?

I do have my own viewpoints on abstinence that are probably more in line with the church but I actually have specific reasons for why I believe the way I do.

1. I'm more than just a vagina designed for male pleasure
2. Women these days make it way too easy for men to have access granted. I think you should have to make a commitment before getting any of my goodies
3. I think I'm more worthy than my bank account. I would not give just anybody access to my PIN number for my bank account so why would I give someone access to my body. My body. My rules
4. I think too many men define themselves by their sexuality and their ability to make women scream and become stalkers. That's all fine and good but I would like to see if I would enjoy talking to you with my clothes on first
5. I believe sex clouds your judgment and building the foundation of a real relationship which is why things crumble so quickly.. People scream about being in love with someone and can't tell you why or they don't even really know the person as a human being.
6. I think it's the highest form of human connection which is why most people are messed up. They're connecting with the wrong people. Soul ties are real.

I only heard a few people break down why abstinence in this manner.  Russell Wilson and Ciara, Megan Goode and Devon Franklin are two celebrity couples who said they were abstaining from marriage.  If you had more of them promoting abstinence over Fred and Freda Frumpy then people may want to listen and give it a chance.

But even then while Russell and Devon were outspoken about their faith...Ciara and Megan Goode weren’t known for being virginal church girls sooooo...yep.