I'm Ready: Here we go....

I have no clue why I am writing this down, but I believe today was a big moment on this sacred journey.  Today felt like a turning point.  It's either the door is closed and time to move on OR it's what Pastor Patrick prophesied to us on Sunday about God speeding up the plans for our lives and getting the traffic flowing in our lives.

I'm keeping in mind that my job isn't to try to deduce or figure it out but it's simply to believe that God is doing SOMETHING and to hang on while he begins to reveal his plan.

Changing the Desires of My Heart

Before I record today's events, I want to share a little of what I studied last night.  I am reading Bob Sorge's book about Unrelenting Prayer and it is nothing short of fantastic.  It has confirmed everything I have experienced on my journey whether it is the accelerated refiners fire program or what you experience in delay.

One of the things that Bob Sorge talks about and that I have experienced is that God begins to change our prayers and the desires of our hearts. It goes from selfish and carnal requests to more of the desires of God's heart.  We also begin to ask God for more.  

I will testify to this:  I am guilty of praying for a husband because I was tired of being human and single.  I also just prayed for a husband and kids.  Now I want a WORLD CHANGING, WORLD IMPACTING, AND LIFE GIVING MARRIAGE.  I have this whole big vision that I am asking God for.

My prayers have changed:  I'm praying to meet this man SO THAT I can introduce him to Jesus Christ and he can be the man he has been called to be.  I pray that God makes me that woman who can influence him towards a relationship with Christ SO THAT we can fulfill our purposes on this Earth.

My prayer is that my motivation is the glory of God and not just my own selfish ambition and need for accomplishment.  The desires of my heart are that I am a servant and concerned with his feelings and building him up SO THAT he can have a confident heart and change many lives.

Phew.   Now that's a total 180 but like Bob Sorge says: It is in the waiting room that God begins to show you what's important.

Today July 10, 2014

I expected something to happen today  It's always easy to say that after the fact, but truthfully I did.  I was even quoting from the Color Purple and singing "God is trying to tell you something" before I left.  As I drove I told God that I was done trying to make it happen and I've asked him to irrevocably close doors that shouldn't be opened so it's on Him to do what he's going to do.  I'm just sitting back chilling and not trying to make things happen.

Thursdays seem to be the day for the excitement and so there I was...looking for excitement.  Every time the elevator opened I was eagerly anticipating excitement to happen.  No go.  I had about 3 exercises left and gave up on the idea of excitement and by this time my back was turned to the entrance and I was focused on what I was doing.  I turned my head and there he was:  Mr. Excitement.

I had to laugh.  Looking for excitement never works.  It just happens

Anyway the game has changed.  It's no longer about any of that silly stuff and nor was I willing to engage it.  

Truthfully I don't know if this is a distraction or what.  I don't even know why I am recording it other than I feel like it's important for some reason.

I have no receipts except disappointment, logic, and other people telling me this is a waste of time.  Maybe it is.  Maybe this is one of those tests along the way to see if I will give in to distraction and temptation.  I don't know.

I do have instincts though and if I can be honest about my instincts: I don't think this is a distraction nor a waste of time.  We'll see what happens from here!

All I know is I expect God to do SOMETHING

Here we go

I'm ready

To God be the Glory