Genesis: Let there be Healing...

This past week I celebrated my birthday!  

This one felt different.  For one thing I had a much more positive attitude than I did last year and another reason is that it felt like we were completing something.  The birthday I am celebrating ends in a 7 which is another reason I believe that we are completing something.

I would also like to add that the scripture of the day on my actual birthday was Proverbs 18:22

He who finds a wife finds what is good    and receives favor from the Lord.

My initial reaction wanted to be

But then I decided that this was wonderful encouragement and that this indeed will be my year of completion.  I am not praying about specific outcomes anymore because if it’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that’s God has his way of doing things and what you thought with human reasoning and assumption is very small minded.

First I pray that I am this woman. That I am indeed a treasure from the Lord and will bring  favor to his life. I pray for wisdom and discernment on how to act and to allow him to take his time....no more trying to make anything happen. Let it go...

Be Anxious for Nothing....Philippians 4:4

I shared on Instagram that one of my major causes of anxiety and angst over the years has been not hitting certain milestones by a certain age.

If you're still keeping score at home, I'm not financially stable, married, or have kids.  This is certainly not where I saw myself at this age....and then again this isn't where I saw myself at this age!! (Excited look)

There is so much opportunity and so much possibility!

One of the ways that I have gotten rid of the anxiety about not being where I thought I was supposed to be by a certain age is that I got rid of:

• Self Imposed Deadlines
• Other people's voices and influences
• Other people's wants and desires for my life

I play the long game in ALL things and I'm not about that grand opening and grand closing life so I don't care if someone gets there before I do.  What's the point in rushing only for it to fall down.  I'm building to last...so I don't care if someone got there before I did.  It's not a race.

A few years ago I learned my best lesson ever on why we shouldn't compare ourselves to other people.  A lot of the time we are comparing ourselves to Lies.  

People show what they want you to believe.  I just read about a "perfect family on Facebook" where the husband killed the pregnant wife and two girls.  "Oh but they always looked so happy on Facebook".

While I'm here, let me drop this knowledge:

The more you need to (over )share your PERFECT life and the harder you're selling it, the more of a train wreck it is. I have seen this happen over and over again. There is no such thing as perfect anything.

So I am just not here anymore for the comparison game.

Let there be...Healing

Yesterday Pastor Dawn preached about the Hagar story and she had a different slant on it about how Hagar was mistreated by Abram and Sarai even though they were the ones using HER.  It was about healing from abusive authority figures whether it be from family or churches.

I went forward about my negative attitude toward authority.  Like Hagar my contempt for authority has led me to a life of running.   I've been running from commitment my whole life.  I just don't want to take the chance of being used and abused like Hagar and having my life ruined.  

I can't live my life this way if I want to do what I'm called to do.  I simply cannot.

I believe that the wife is under the authority of her husband who is under the authority of God.  How on earth am I going to be under the authority of a husband if I'm cynical and negative towards authority figures.  I absolutely cannot do it!

How can I lead a pride of lionesses if I have no respect for authority figures if I want to be in a position of authority myself?  

I need to be under spiritual authority and I suppose this means I need to commit myself to Shiloh Church and their leadership.  I said I would never join another church....but  this is different. I went on and on in my Seed Sowing Declaration about how I believe I'm called to serve at Shiloh, my husband is as well, and our children will be rooted and taught there.

*Sigh*

I'm coming into Shiloh with an agenda:  To see revival and to establish my pride of lionesses that will defend the family and also expand the Kingdom in this historic hour.

I believe there is a general healing and cleansing going on at Shiloh.  We absolutely cannot be a force or a catalyst for revival if we aren't right.  I read a book by Frank Bartleman who had a front row seat to the Azusa Revival and was a big part of it with his preaching and teaching.  He kept stressing that terrible conviction came upon the people as well as repentance...especially for the preachers and ministers who received the baptism of the Holy Spirit.

In order for revival to take place, two things must happen

• Prayer
• Repentance/Healing

So this is right on track with what I believe is about to be a major move of God

So what about this

This is still on my radar but I'm falling back from it because I'm not supposed to be trying to make anything happen.  I decided to focus my attention on networking and connecting with women I want to be in my pride of Lionesses which is what I am doing.

I said this could not happen by force or by might but only by HIS spirit.  That means no trying to be extra or any of that.  

I've got my kingdom assignment and so I'm focusing my attention on that.  

More Kingdom business and Less Singled Out.  

However I am available....Take a Chance on Me...Do Not Pass Me By.  Go on and get yo favor from the Lord!