Church Refugees: How to Re-engage those of us who are done or almost done

Church refugees cites 3 ways churches can reignite us "Dones" or us “Almost dones” that are sitting on the fence about church

1. Invite Participation within Limits
2. Undermine Bureacracy
3. Be Truly Relational

Invite Participation within Limits

I have left a church because I felt that their entire mission was to preserve what already was. They weren't interested in innovation or doing anything different. They wanted to keep doing the same things over and over again with the same old people.

By inviting participation of congregants with limitations you're giving a chance for members to grow as well as the church to grow through the experiences

The author of church refugees Josh Packard says this:

“For churches failure is an opportunity to learn, grow, and communicate to congregants that church leadership doesn't have all the answers and could use their help. It opens doors to new ideas and shakes organizations out of old routines. “

So true! The church I mentioned that refuses to do anything new and grow has lost so many talented and on fire people because they don't allow newer people who aren't connected to do anything meaningful. Meanwhile I see that they still have the same 5 people doing the same things years later. They refuse to allow participation of others outside of the inner circle.  I get that it's comfortable and what you know but that's not providing growth.

2. Undermine bureaucracy

If we are being completely honest, The mission of most churches is to keep the doors open and I get that but I think if they took their eyes off of trying to make the church an organizational structure and into a transformational system then much of that would take care of itself. The reason you're having trouble paying your bills is because you've got declining attendance. The reason you've got declining attendance is because you've ran all the people away because you're not doing anything meaningful.

3. Be Truly Relational

In an era when the church spends so much money and resources on outreach, it's striking that the institution as perceived as lacking “a sensitivity of spirit and compassion” - Church Refugees

On Facebook I've seen people I've known from church bragging online about each time they've helped a homeless person. I find that same type of attitude goes with outreach a lot of the time. People's hearts may be in the right place but they are still seeking people's approval for being charitable.

I like to constantly remind myself of this if I'm tempted to post about a good deed

Matthew 6:2-32 When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. 3 But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.

I think it's fine to want to do outreach but I think it's even more important to build relationships with people. In my business I do what's called relational marketing. My whole goal is to build relationships with people so that I can help them achieve their objectives.

I often wonder what would happen if most churches asked themselves what the objectives of their outreach programs are and then asked themselves what problems are they helping to solve with their outreach programs.

Are the outreach programs truly for the community in order to build relationships and help solve community problems?  

Are the outreach programs for the church to feel as though they are doing something ?

I've been part of churches that didn't do nothing for nobody (bad grammar on purpose) so I will give credit to churches who at least have some type of outreach for people.

When I was in college there was a guy who volunteered for a mission and he didn't like that they wouldn't feed people until they listened to a sermon. He argued with the people running the mission that Jesus met people's needs physically and then they received from Him spiritually.

Well the people running the mission didn't like that line of thinking. They thought the people would just take the food and not listen to the sermon. The people were hungry so of course they were going to be there to get their physical needs met!  If you were in it to build relationally then you know that if they kept coming the gospel would be preached through action and may even be more well received.

After the Mission leaders told him that the people needed to listen to the sermon first before any food, the young man stopped volunteering.

Along those same lines, Here's what one of the interviewees said in church refugees

“The best the church seems to be able to do with regard to missions is deciding what people need and doing that for or to them.  I find it undignified. It doesn't involve truly listening to people in need or interacting with them personally. I've found that dynamic in even the most well intentioned missions like providing clothes or food for people.
It tends to just keep the problem Alive and keep the dynamic in place of the haves controlling the have-nots rather than interacting in relationship with them in the way Christ has called us to.”

I completely agree. It's about building relationships and adding Jesus to the story so people can have real victory not another church service!