Live from the Wilderness: Hard Truth #7- Titles and positions but no function!

As a fitness professional, functional training became the rage several years ago. 

Traditional training focused more on the aesthetic training that bodybuilders used to have a physique pleasing to the eye.  It had nothing to do with what was helpful to people in real life.

Aesthetic training isn't helpful for people who sit most of the day or want to be able to move better, so enter functional training.  Training that is used to mimic the activities of every day life.  With functional training, we have people moving in all planes of motion, movements that simulate every day life.  It's used to improve performance and stave off injury.

Traditional bodybuilding training tends to lead to injury, imbalance, and loss of flexibility.  Besides if you sit all day sitting on machines isn't the most effective way to get a workout.  There's no function with sitting on a machine.  How often do you perform those movements in every day life?  However practicing squats will improve FUNCTION in every day life since we perform that movement all the time.

Well I have come to the conclusion that in my life I have been craving titles and positions.  I cared about the aesthetics of the titles, but wasn't tuned into the FUNCTION of what these titles mean.

Titles mean nothing

If I learned anything from my last job it is that titles mean absolutely NOTHING.   I was a manager and I was trying to follow the examples of the LEADERS I knew and respect in my own life that were successful.  In the context I was in, that didn't work.  I'm motivated by passion, wanting to do my best, and making an IMPACT.  

I soon realized that management with this company wasn't for me.  I wanted the title and position, but I wasn't able to FUNCTION at my best in this role.  I felt like I had to put my intelligence, ethics, and creativity on mute and pretend to go along with low level thinking.

As we all know, I failed miserably in my role as manager.  I'm not even that upset about it because I know I don't belong in that role.

This also taught me to not seek out titles and positions, but to seek out the places where I can best serve.  I don't belong behind a desk unless it is to do my own administrative work.  I should be out amongst the people making an IMPACT.

Seeking the Title of the Wife

I listened to a teaching recently which led me to another point of conviction:  The good Bishop said, Stop seeking titles if you're not willing to FUNCTION in that role.   You need to be able to be PRESENT and CONNECTED in the roles you seek.

I began to realize that I'm seeking the title of wife more to prove that there is nothing wrong with me rather than thinking about the FUNCTION of that role.  I want that title to prove to people that there is NOTHING wrong with me.  I'm not weird, I'm not unlovable, I am good enough, and yes even though that area has always been a failure for me...look at me now:  I can do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING I can put my mind to.  I can accomplish EVERYTHING I set out to do including getting married.

Sadly I think that many of us in our 30's who haven't gotten married yet feel like this.  I think due to self imposed and outside pressures we begin to crave marriage not even for companionship.  We want to prove that there is nothing wrong with us.

In particular I think this is difficult for those trying to live according to their belief systems.  It seems fruitless and pointless to try to live according to what you believe when everyone else is out doing whatever they want and getting everything they want.

It is hard to watch people get married and have children like it's nothing, when you're sitting there trying to do the right things.  But as I like to think we are judging their outsides without knowing any of the behind the scenes stories.  We don't know what's really going on...all we know is that they know that they have what we want.

One of my favorite sayings is:  The grass may look greener on the other side but a lot of the time it is poison ivy.

Stop Seeking Titles and Start Seeking FUNCTION!

Anyway as I began to come to this realization, I added another thing to the inner work list for God to complete in me:

Lord help me to STOP seeking titles and START seeking function.  I don't want to just have the title of wife.  I want to function as a partner.  I don't want to just have the title of Mommy.  I want to be present and connected to my children and family.  I want to be all in.

I don't want just the title of leader or manager.  I want the FUNCTION of being a leader and making an IMPACT.  I went on a job interview last week and when they asked me why I didn't want to be a manager I said, "I belong out in the trenches".  I belong out touching the people.  Who cares if I don't have a title of manager?  The lives mean more than the title.

I think if I concentrate on what I SHOULD be doing, everything else will fall into place.  I would rather be known for the impact I have on lives that numbers or any of that other nonsense.

I am thanking God for these hard truths.  I still say that I am learning so much faster than I had before.  The lessons are coming fast and furiously.  I KNOW he is changing my life and I couldn't be more grateful.

To God be the Glory!