52 Days to Rebuild: Liberation!!
Well it's Day 50 and there hasn't been much change on the surface.
Behind the scenes? With my mindset? Yes indeed...but on the surface? Nah
At first I felt discouraged and annoyed. Then I remembered I wasn't going to allow myself to be led by my emotions. Besides that I am not as easily fooled as I was a few years ago. I realize where the negative thoughts come from and I am a lot better about shutting them down.
I've decided if it's already done, then we'll just let it play out.
I am able to talk about it now without all the embarrassment and shame. I am allowing myself to hope for a positive outcome. Before I wouldn't even do that because I was so certain of disappointment.
I feel like I'm coming out....I feel so liberated.
a) It is very unlikely that I would have made it all up
b) By now I would have tried to storm the gates or sabotage it
c) I have peace about it
I remember in our Worship as a Lifestyle class, one of the teachers was recounting when she was waiting for the adoption of her son to be final and there were obstacles, she said: "We decided to praise God like he was at home." I decided that was my attitude. I was going to dance around and get hyped even though nothing much has changed in the natural.
I said I was going to run around the church if God answered this prayer and I already did that a few times. I have been under a desk. I climbed on top of furniture and sang "I am no longer a slave to fear." So I have done all of these things and I will get more undignified than this!
To God be the Glory. ALWAYS!!
Behind the scenes? With my mindset? Yes indeed...but on the surface? Nah
At first I felt discouraged and annoyed. Then I remembered I wasn't going to allow myself to be led by my emotions. Besides that I am not as easily fooled as I was a few years ago. I realize where the negative thoughts come from and I am a lot better about shutting them down.
I've decided if it's already done, then we'll just let it play out.
Liberation
For some reason ever since I decided to let it go, I've been able to talk about what's been going on and this hidden thing. This secret thing.
This
I feel like I'm coming out....I feel so liberated.
This is a real thing...
I've also decided this must be a real thing becausea) It is very unlikely that I would have made it all up
b) By now I would have tried to storm the gates or sabotage it
c) I have peace about it
I remember in our Worship as a Lifestyle class, one of the teachers was recounting when she was waiting for the adoption of her son to be final and there were obstacles, she said: "We decided to praise God like he was at home." I decided that was my attitude. I was going to dance around and get hyped even though nothing much has changed in the natural.
I said I was going to run around the church if God answered this prayer and I already did that a few times. I have been under a desk. I climbed on top of furniture and sang "I am no longer a slave to fear." So I have done all of these things and I will get more undignified than this!
Resistance is Futile
This tweet cracked me up because it is so true. I was very upset and annoyed about this crush business. I tried very hard to turn it off but it wasn't working. In fact even now I get the giggles and I can't stop smiling.
I certainly didn't want anymore crushes and definitely not at church. Why get hopes up to be disappointed? Plus there are so many things that are not "normal" and "right" about this but doggone it I just can't turn it off no matter how hard I try.
So I say May Your Will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven!!
To God be the Glory. ALWAYS!!
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