Pandemic Chronicles #27 The Formula is Seek First the Kingdom of God

Luke 12:31

31 He will always give you all you need from day to day if you will make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

Last Summer I abandoned my Single Journey because I was tired of expending so much energy into something that got ZERO results and quite frankly I decided that there were more pressing issues to be concerned about during a pandemic than complaining aboutt being single.

This past Fall I did join in with Fasting 21 Days for My Future Spouse. I sensed things changing. This praying for a spouse no longer felt like an idol so I decided to try one more time.

This month my goal was to get off social media in order to focus on my writing and also to focus on our relationship....well as of Feb 23, I'm still the only one in our relationship in the natural. 😂😂😂

BUT

I have had an epiphany...Again.

Relationships in the Christian Community are a Commodity for profit and just like in the Self Employment and Self Improvement Space,we've got too many people more than willing to take advantage off of the naive and inscure.

Deja Vu...Relationships as a Commodity

I've been so agitated and irritated the last few weeks that I've withdrawn from even discussing singleness because I'm not exactly sure how to verbalize my dismay and disgust about people taking advantage of single women to make a profit.

Even worse I think their bad advice is leading single women down the Highway to Hell of poor Results.

This is all very reminiscent of what I experienced in the Self Improvement and Self Employment space. You had business coaches who didn't have successful businesses "coaching" others how to make money grabs of their own and how to charge for overpriced courses and classes. 

 In the Self Improvement space, it's common to hear about how various "Your Best Life" gurus had train wreck lives off the stage and contrary to sparkling social media profiles.

To see this happening in an area that is so sensitive and emotionally exhausting for so many women especially, I'm very disheartened but I'm also resolute that it's time for something DIFFERENT. It's time for single Christian women to be empowered and not exploited.

With that being said, I'm here at the First Hill I'm going to die on and go against the Dating Advice for Christian singles.

Luke 12:31

31 He will always give you all you need from day to day if you will make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. (The Living Bible...Love this Translation) 

This includes relationships.

We don't need formulas to find "The One" (I don't even think that exists) and we certainly don't need bad advice from people so that they will have a steady customer base when their terrible advice and resources backfire and don't have good results.

We for sure don't need "experts" and "coaches" who haven't even lived out what they are trying to sell people.  

For example, dating coaches who don't even have a successful relationship but are out here trying to tell people how they should be dating.

The end goal is always the same with these people: SALES. 

These people host their crap under the guise of self investment to sell people the next book, course, or conference and make money off of them. 

It's just awful but capitalis is the American Way.  I believe in the Free Market so I also believe those who know better have a choice to tune out and not give these people any of our money.

This is what I ain't gone do

This month it also became clear to me that there are some things that I am just not going to do. 

 In the King's English, it's translated: This is what I ain't gone do.

I'm not going to put dating and a relationship ahead of my service in the Kingdom. Putting that desire ahead of my service to the Kingdom is idolatry and it's 100% wrong.

This issue recently came up for me and I found myself questioning if I was throwing myself into e ministry activities in order to avoid confronting the relationship thing.

I don't think so.  I think I am just at the point where I'm realizing how big OUR call is (cause it's not just mine) and how serious it is. It's a preparation season.

I declared that I wanted to serve alongside my husband at Shiloh and wherever else God calls us and I am 100% positive that is going to happen even though there doesn't appear to be anything happening.

Yet the Hill I am willing to die on is:

Luke 12:31
31 He will always give you all you need from day to day if you will make the Kingdom of God your Primary Concern

What is my Primary Concern?

This month I have had to confront whether my Primary Concern is Dating and Relationships or is it the Kingdom of God?  If it's dating and relationships, then it is an idol.

Relationships are an idol for many women in the church and the marketers exploit this. Because there is an imbalance of men and women in the church, single women are a target demographic because the marketers have done the research.  They know that women are willing to spend money in order to change their single status. 

Thus we have the courses, the conferences, the coaching, the podcasts, and all that for women to find a man under the misnomer of self investment. It's mainly money grabs for the creators of this nonsense.

Some may sincerely have a heart for women and are misguided but others know an easy money grab when they see one.

As a side note, it is an interesting discussion as to why there are so few men in the church. Some argue it's because the church is too feminine but a fantastic article in Christianity Today says that the church has always had more women than men...even in the early church!  (Source: Christianity Today

What I am Gone Do: Put it on the Altar

In the Past Week, I have had to come to the place of asking myself is my desire for a relationship and marriage an Idol?  

Would I put my desire for a relationship on the altar? 

My answer is Yes.

I had a very powerful moment in prayer this past week where I said out loud that If it's between the ministry and a romantic relationship, then I'm choosing the ministry. I do not want to risk ruining the ministry or great friendships because I want to be married and I'm projecting my own ideas onto a situation.

I will not turn a ministry into The Young and The Restless.

I have been down that road before and it caused nothing but confusion and anger.

I believe that the ministries I'm involved with are going to make a major Impact and many souls will be saved and that's the biggest priority.

I was prompted to go back to the story of Abraham and Isaac

Abraham was willing to put his son Isaac on the altar. Abraham trusted God enough to stand in faith that the Lord would provide.  I believe the same is true for us all.  If God asks us to put it on the altar, then will we try to hold on to it or will we say like Abraham: "Don't worry...The Lord Will Provide"

And Sure enough...he LOOKED UP and there was the Ram in the Bush

Genesis 22:11-12New International Version

11 But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!”

“Here I am,” he replied.

12 “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”

13 Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram[a] caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son.

Genesis 22:14 New International Version

 

14 So Abraham called that place The Lord Will Provide. And to this day it is said, “On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”

I choose to say "On the Mountain of the Lord it will be provided" and I am rooting for the Ram in the Bush!!

So about this challenge...

I believe this past month was a test.  

I've been so drained and coming to terms with this that for a moment I thought, "You see...this was a complete waste of time.  Why even bother?"

As I've gotten my strength and energy back it changed to: "I believe God is doing something"

Even little things that I said a few years ago that I would like to see happen in a relationship are coming to mind and coming to pass but there's no relationship in the natural...yet.

I'm standing firm on Mark 11:24. I believe that I've already received it and now we watch God bring it to pass like only he can and he will receive every bit of Glory.