They that wait: Building Strength

I haven't written on this blog for a month and I suspect it's because I've been immersed in my other writing projects and also because I've been in a place where I've felt

Ending the War on Myself

On my other blog I've talked about how I am ending the war with myself, I've stopped dieting, I've stopped trying to fix myself, and I've stopped trying to prove that I am enough and I've stopped telling myself the story that I am NOT enough.

That of course is a spiritual revelation.  The book Women Food and God helped put words to the shift I had been feeling for weeks.  I no longer felt the need for validation about my weight or who I was.  I was no longer letting my inner critic dictate my life.  I was pushing past that.  I had stopped trying to fix myself so that I can be enough.  For the most part I have stopped comparing myself to others and thinking about what I should have and then deciding the reason I don't have it is because I am not enough.

It's one of those A-ha Moments that came on subtly but when it did breakthrough it broke through.  This is not to say I am perfect in this area.  No I am not.  Feelings still come on from time to time but I have embraced Imperfect Progress.  Progress wrapped in Grace.

Certain Belief

By ending the war on myself, it has helped strengthen my resolve and CERTAIN BELIEF that this journey I am on is anointed and ordained by God.  I have CERTAIN BELIEF that the stirrings I've felt, the leads that I've followed up on, and the inner work I am doing to change my internal environment is all leading to seeing my vision come to pass.  I have CERTAIN BELIEF that it will happen and by ending the war on myself, it has helped me to develop the mindset/resolve to do crazy.  You will only take crazy action if you have CERTAIN BELIEF that this is going to happen.

Yes I had a stirring earlier this year, set an intention, and followed up on it.  One of the things I have learned is to let go out of outcomes.  I don't know if that stirring was just to wake me up and get me on this path of self discovery or if it is actually leading somewhere.  I don't know but I do know I have CERTAIN BELIEF that it was all a part of the plan.

Reclaiming my Why

Right after I wrote my last post about Great Faith, I went through a week or two of the blahs.  Life seemed very boring after an exciting September and I was just feeling very blah.  I wasn't excited or fired up and I began to wonder if what I was doing was a complete waste of time.

I attended the Nor-Cal Fitness Summit and let me tell you that was like a Revival.  People shared very personal stories and how they did not give up.  They are all very successful now and you would not believe some of what the presenters had gone through because they did not look like what they had been through.  It even got to a point where someone revealed the abuse they had been through.  It was deep deep deep.

Through all of the presentations though, there was a recurring theme:  What is your Why?  What is your calling?  Why are you doing this?

I was fired up from the weekend and on Monday Morning when I did my quiet time and revisited my Why.  The Lord led me to my Why

Isaiah 61:1

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me,
    for the Lord has anointed me
    to bring good news to the poor.
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
    and to proclaim that captives will be released
    and prisoners will be freed.[a]

This is my Why.  This is what I am building a foundation for.  I have a message, I am writing a story, and I am doing it for the very reasons written above.  One of the presenters asked the question:  IF someone wants to escape from prison, then what is the FIRST thing they need to know.  I was the only person who answered it correctly:  

He has to know he is in prison.

So many women are in the prison of negativity, hopelessness, and despair and they don't even know it!  They don't know it but I am going to tell them so they can break out.

Building Strength

I'm building strength in my spiritual life AND in the gym.  Faith building.  In the past six months, I have worked less than I ever have and I am making enough to pay my bills and save. I am also doing what I love which is to write and I am so excited to be writing in real time the story and basis for my first round of teaching. You have got to live it to give it!  Let me tell you everyone at that Fitness Summit told a story that we won't forget.   That is how you teach people: With a story.  The greatest teacher ever taught that way.

Jesus even taught in stories cause he knew people's attention spans weren't very long and too many big words and complicated teachings just will make people tune out.  Oh I am so FIRED UP to tell the story of God's faithfulness and much of it hasn't even happened yet but still..you won't be able to SHUT ME UP when I get to tell of God's provision and faithfulness.

I don't understand it except to say that, "On the Mountain of the Lord it will be provided".  I am rolling out new program ideas and expanding my territory because The Lord has anointed ME.  I think more people need help and I am the one that needs to help them.

In my project, I am in this phase of the story.  Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.  As the song says, God I'm not moving.  I'm here waiting on You.

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
    They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
    They will walk and not faint.

I have made up in my mind that I am going to place my trust and hope in God.  Not in people, not on my circumstances, and not on other people's expectations.  I am finding new strength.  This year I have done things I've always wanted to do, I've taken some pretty big risks, and I don't know where I've gotten the courage to do it except to say that I got this strength by continuing to build my faith.

Bob Marley said that, "A house built with sand will fall into the sea".  I don't want that.  I do not want a life that crumbles and becomes useless and irrelevant.  So I'm willing to wait. I'm willing to allow God to strengthen me to be who I need to be for all that he has for me.  I believe in God's promises.  

Let it Rain

We're experiencing a drought here in California.  Honestly the American Church is also experiencing a tremendous drought.  Their lack of love and fear is just pathetic but ANYWAY.  I remember Bishop Garlington had us shout last year that the "DROUGHT IS OVER" three times.  it just came out that forecasters are predicting the biggest El Nino ever this season.  I remember El Nino 20 years ago and it was a torrential mess.  

Pastor David of Shiloh Church said a few months ago that in the natural they are predicting a big downpour of rain over our dry land and the Lord has said that in the spirit we will be experiencing a great downpour of the Holy Spirit.  Have to say with the way things are going, I absolutely believe it.

Let it Rain.  Let it Rain. Open the FLOODGATES OF HEAVEN.  LET IT RAIN!

COME HOLY SPIRIT!!!

To God be the Glory